Learning to be HappY**
Life is a challenge, it's full of obstacles that we have to overcome, but when we do, it feels better than anything. This week i went to Italy, with my class, it was our last schooltrip as we all graduate soon. And i can honestly say, that it leaves the best feeling ever. It's not so much about the trip on it's self, but about the feeling it leaves behind, about the memories, about friendship, about yourself.
This week has been emotionaly heavy in every way possible. I've cried, laughed, i've been mad, sad, angry, sick, unhappy, extatic; i've felt the love and the hate, and i've create connections that i thought faded away. In two words: exhausting and unforgettable!
I've seen sides of me that i didn't even know, and i learnt to protect myself from them. I've always been scared to open myself up to people that are strangers to me, or to people that might be able to hurt me, and this week there have been two persons, that cracked me open, that made the effort to get to know me. And it feels so good, it makes me a lot more self-confident than i was. Because i realized that people actually like me for me, and not everyone will run away if they get to know me.
Apart from needing someone, i felt needed by someone else, and loved. I've always had my friends, and of course, Xan, but know someow it feels complete, i feel complete. And only the thought of this puts a smile on my face. I guess i found just one more reason to smile every day.
It's this feeling in my stomach, not only of love, but this feeling that tells me everything is fine, it's alright. Not of guilt, just that i should enjoy it and share it ! And that's what i'ma bout to do!
I can better take this chance and share with everyone, and make other people happy, than sit around feeling guilty about my happines, because i know it won't last forever, but i know it wil always come back, and when it does the next time, ui'll be ready to accept it and take it in!
xxx - Lex
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